Comments on: Selling Jewelry to Friends vs. Giving Jewelry to Friends

By: Rena Klingenberg

Rena Klingenberg — Mon, 13 Nov 2017 07:21:00 +0000

In reply to Sundarii. Hi Sundarii, thank you for sharing your experience with this issue.

By: Sundarii

Sundarii — Mon, 13 Nov 2017 06:39:54 +0000

I loved this article, especially since I have struggled with this issue for years. I used to make beaded jewelry for many years + have always given my pieces as gifts to my friends. If someone else wants one, or something similar, I have trouble thinking what would be a reasonable price. (I’m a sucker + usually do it for free.) now I am retired + my income is very limited. It used to be that everytime I went into a bead store, It would cost me $200-400. a pop. I can no longer afford to giveaway everything I make., but how do I tell my friends that I cannot afford to give everything to them + their friends + their family.
I still feel guilty at the thought of leaving someone out, but after 30+ yrs of giving it all away, it’s really hard to say no.

By: Rena Klingenberg

Rena Klingenberg — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 20:18:25 +0000

In reply to Theresa Abell.

Theresa, thank you for sharing your experiences with the gift vs. sales dilemma. I had a relative take advantage in a similar way when I was first starting out with jewelry. It sure teaches us a lesson when that happens. I like the system you use – very fair to others and to yourself. 🙂

By: Theresa Abell

Theresa Abell — Wed, 08 Nov 2017 18:13:20 +0000

I learned the gift vs sales lesson well. I gave a coworker (only 2 females in the office) some pieces as I was learning to make jewelry. When another woman asked what I charged for my work, the coworker told her “Just wait & she’ll just give it to you”. I learned a valuable lesson and that the coworker wasn’t the appreciative “friend” I thought she was.
Since then, I gift friends with pieces/sets when they have done a service for me….a friend helps me with my craft shows. I don’t pay her with money but with jewelry…we’re both happy that way. Also I have a dear friend who commissions me to design & assemble the beads she returns with from AZ each year. I charge her for my time & additions to the beads she brings me to work with. She is able to pay and would not take the sets for free unless it was a birthday, etc. This works out well for us both & has helped to fund a retreat that I wished to attend.
Immediate family gets gifts but I also trade with my daughter-in-law who does a home business & loves my earrings. We’re both happy then.
Time expended and materials used make a big difference on gift giving, as well.

By: Allison

Allison — Tue, 31 Oct 2017 17:14:17 +0000

The implication seems to be that your friend wants to buy it – since you mention setting a price. All of my friends and family have received pieces as gifts, and many of them have bought from me for themselves and others, too. I either ask them what they are looking to spend, or tell them what I would normally charge for the piece and offer a friends and family discount on that price. If they tell me they can only spend x dollars and it is way out of line with what I would need to charge, I tell them so and if I want to, offer to rework the design with less expensive components. I say “want to” because some designs wouldn’t be right done more cheaply, and some friends of friends don’t really appreciate what goes into the work.

By: Dorothy

Dorothy — Tue, 31 Oct 2017 14:33:26 +0000

Several years ago an elderly friend asked me if I would crochet an afghan from kits she purchased for each of her two daughters-in-law. Because she was a dear friend and insisted on paying me for doing them, I only charged her $10 for them, even though the afghans were intricate designs that involved many hours of work. ( I figured out that I earned about 10 cents an hour for crocheting them!) One of the daughters-in-law figured it was a great deal and bought another kit for me to crochet for her for $10. I turned down her request knowing that she and her husband had more than enough money to pay a fair price for the project, and I didn’t even actually know her.

By: Lisa

Lisa — Tue, 31 Oct 2017 13:48:45 +0000

If this a business for you, price it as you would any other piece including time and materials. I offer a 15% discount to my newsletter subscribers and often give that family & friends. You have to treat your business like a business or no one else will either. If it's a hobby, charge her for your materials with a slight mark up just to make a profit. We gift at our discretion and as artists, that's our right. Don't feel guilty for gifting something to one friend and not another.

By: Barbara MacDougall

Barbara MacDougall — Tue, 31 Oct 2017 11:31:54 +0000

I will give one item to friends and family. The price of that item depends on the closeness of the friendship. I always have done, even when I was doing portraits, paintings and drawings. After that, they pay full price. However, they do NOT get to choose their free item at a show, period. If they see something they like, they either buy it on the spot or take a chance it’ll still be there after the show.

Any subsequent Christmas or birthday gifts are at my discretion.

I do have a frequent-buyer discount, usually around 10% to 20% discount (which I’ve already built into my pricing schedule), or I’ll throw in a pair of earrings for half price, but again, that’s at my discretion.

If friends/family want something using more expensive materials or is complex and time-consuming for me to make, I invite them to come to my place, give them a length of stringing wire, and they put it together themselves. They pay for the beads, findings and clasp of their choice and budget, I do the crimping and they put in the design time. Gives them newfound respect for what it is I — we — actually do!

Plus it’s a really nice way to spend a Sunday afternoon: we have a potluck lunch and make a party out of it. Everyone is very pleased at the end with what THEY have created.

Barbara

By: Geri

Geri — Tue, 30 May 2017 18:36:39 +0000

Ask her what budget she has in mind and go from there.

By: Aimee

Aimee — Tue, 29 Sep 2015 13:34:24 +0000

Yeah, that’s awkward. I have a friend who always asks me about my pieces and the prices, but never buys anything. I always tell her I’ll give her my friends and family discount of 20%, which is the best I can do.

She was recently talking about a pair of earrings she wanted me to special make her, and I gave her a price, but then I felt guilty, because she has done me several favors in the past, including watching my dog recently when I went away. I told her I will gift her the earrings, because I also realize she’s a popular girl and will likely advertise my jewelry if she’s wearing it.

The moral of my story is to ask yourself whether it’s worth it to sell to this friend, or is a gift in order (if you choose the gift route, definitely make sure it’s clear that it’s for a reason…a birthday, Christmas, or a thank you).

By: Dianne Haselfeld

Dianne Haselfeld — Wed, 03 Sep 2014 19:51:53 +0000

I recently sold a necklace to a friend but it was at her insistence. I usually give gifts to my friends and family. If they ask me to make something for them I do it just for material costs. However, I receive free lunches, dinners and other treats in return so I don’t really feel I am doing it “for nothing”.

By: Cat

Cat — Wed, 27 Aug 2014 21:38:44 +0000

I say, don’t worry about it. If you want to give someone a gift, give it, and don’t stress about what others will think. I would never charge my immediate family for anything, as that to me is just wrong…but even friends I’ve known for years don’t expect free pieces. I think we tend to worry about everyone’s feelings, forgetting this is a business. If people have a problem with anything you do, whether it be gifting one and not the other, or charging full price or at a discount, etc….explain to them that business is business and friendship is friendship. You have to be able to separate the two. I struggled with this for years as well, and my life got a LOT easier once that distinction was made!

By: Pam

Pam — Wed, 27 Aug 2014 13:37:15 +0000

Love the copper & tree stump jewelry/earring displays. Do you have a tutorial on that? Just curious what glue if any was used & gauge wire.
Thanks,
Pam

By: Nata

Nata — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 20:41:46 +0000

I always find honesty saves a lot of embarassment and confusion and even anger in such situation. Why not ask your friend right away whether she means to purchase or as a free gift? That may just clear the situation right away. I believe there is no need to be shy when it comes to your self-worth, both as a person and as an artist. Good luck!

By: Cindy

Cindy — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 19:18:13 +0000

I am just getting started into making jewelry as I have been crocheting, although, when it comes to making a piece of “goods” as a gift vs. selling, it all boils down to the same thing. A gift is a gift and someone asking you to make a something for them is completely different. What I would do is let this common friend know what materials you will need, i.e., stones, beads, crystals and ask her to pick them up and you could offer to give her a discount on the wire, findings, crimp beads, etc., but, not charge her for your time. There is a lot of factors to consider when making something and for me the most valuable part of the project is my time that I am putting into it because I think I am worth a lot more than the materials, lol!!! Things become quite expensive when we continue to make for friends when they ask. As I said before a gift is a gift that you want to make for someone for your own special reasons, when being asked to make something then someone is asking you to provide a service to/for them. It is a difficult situation to be in, although, if a common friend of mine asked me to make something and then made the assumption that it was going to be free, I would say they were being quite bold and/or rude and I am not trying to be harsh. Setting a policy/boundaries, up front and from the very beginning and then sticking to it will be the only way you will be able to stay in business!! Good luck and remember, charity begins at home, lol!!

By: Cindi Bernloehr

Cindi Bernloehr — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 16:20:32 +0000

That is always a hard situation.
Here is an approach I have used. I tell my friend that I usually “sell” a specific piece for $$$ but would be happy to give her a 10-20% discount because she is a friend. That way she feels special but I’m not out completly. I got this idea because I work Farmer’s markets and fellow vendors usually discount to each other 10%.

By: Jeanne Lyons

Jeanne Lyons — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 16:08:56 +0000

I don’t quite know if I understand your concern… does the second friend know it was gift? did she just like it ? did she say she’d purchase it? was the friend wanting you to make it as a gift for her, too? or are you worried about the 2 of them knowing the cost? I guess I just over think things too much.
I’ve dealt with something similar with my daughters. I make them each something for Christmas (we don’t celebrate birthdays w/ gifts) and sometimes they like what the other got and ask me to make it for them to purchase. I tell them I’ll gladly make a SIMILAR one for her and that way the price won’t specifically be the same as the original one’s cost. Sure, they’ll know the ballpark cost but it really shouldn’t matter if it’s what she wanted. I have had no repercussions, so far. I would hope that friends would understand as well. If it’s hurt feelings that she didn’t receive a gift as well, it’s really all about her and she may not be as close a friend as you thought.

By: allison

allison — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 12:54:15 +0000

I’ve had friends ask to commission a piece like one I had given before, but not as a gift – unless it was in the vein of “Next Christmas I would love something like that if you are looking for ideas!” – and that only from people with whom I regularly trade gifts. What I do is a “friend and family” price – what I would usually charge less a discount – how much a discount depends on what they are asking for. I let them know they are getting a special price, which usually takes care of any potential hurt feelings.

By: Barbara Lynn

Barbara Lynn — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 11:37:41 +0000

I’ve never been in that situation either, but I did have a co-worker once inform me that I had hurt her feelings because I gave another co-worker a gift and had never given her anything even though I had known her longer. I was a little taken back, especially since the co-worker who felt hurt was not someone I really associated with. I told her I was sorry if she felt hurt and that it wasn’t my intention to hurt her, but I have to this day never given her anything other than a gift at Christmas time. (Subsequently, all the females in my office received a bracelet/earrings gift as well.) IMO, if the friend expects their request to be free, that is their own “ego” talking and not a friend.

By: Lisa Rohrssen

Lisa Rohrssen — Tue, 26 Aug 2014 11:30:18 +0000

I gift on birthdays and Christmas a reasonable piece. I work in mostly sterling silver so it can get pricy. No one has asked me to give them anything most are aware of how expensive it was to get my studio set up and all the tools I had to buy just to get up and running.

I do trade for other pieces, art and services.

By: Autumn

Autumn — Mon, 25 Aug 2014 06:44:16 +0000

Wow, that is difficult. I traded jewelry for other services with fellow small business owners (friends), but it was an equal trade. It it wasn’t a trade, then my friends were straight out buying items. I’ve only given one pendant away as a gift. I’m not sure what I would do in that sort of situation. I’d love to read what everyone else says.